Let Go of Disappointment and Let Love In
It is normal to feel disappointment when one of our hopes or expectations is not being met. Disappointment is the gap between what we thought would happen and what actually happened. Part of life is learning how to adapt to new situations and bounce back, but it is still a hard emotion to deal with. Some of us find it harder than others, especially when it feels like a constant pattern in our life. When our disappointment is linked to another person not meeting our expectations, it can feel permanent because everyone has the right to make their own choices which can make us feel like there is nothing we can do but to live with the disappointment.
Lucky for us there is always something we can do to help us grow out of our hardships. And our emotions are actually tools from which we can learn and grow. Disappointment gives us a new outlook on what’s important to us. To quote Samuel Johnson: “Disappointment, when it involves neither shame nor loss, is as good as success; for it supplies as many images to the mind, and as many topics to the tongue.” Meaning that the feeling of disappointment can teach us just as much as a success because it can lead us to see what is important to us, what actions worked, what actions didn’t work and what we can do moving forward to avoid feeling disappointed again. Let go of the fear of feeling disappointment and let in curiosity for the new lessons to be learned.
At IdareU2bee.com we have a team that creates programs, activities, workshops, and books that support the social and emotional skill development of kids, parents, guardians, and teachers. It is not complicated to minimize the impacts that disappointment can have if you allow yourself to discover the power that the emotion of love can have on your mind and your body during those scary moments.
Letting go of disappointment and trading it in for love and curiosity will make you more confident. When you are more confident, you become less attached to what could go wrong and focus more on what could go right. Give yourself permission to accept your emotions for what they are and then think critically through the situation to know you deserve the best so that disappointment does not stop you.
Practice the following actions to help you LET GO OF DISAPPOINTMENT and LET LOVE WIN!
- Write down what disappoints you– Make a list of what is disappointing you no matter how small. Be specific about what and how these disappointments affect you, list from least impactful to greatest. This will help pinpoint the areas in your life that are impacting your identity, and your ability to feel safe, secure, and loved.
- Avoid negative talk- remove all the negative talk towards your disappointment. Speaking negatively gets you nowhere, it is not a proactive way to handle disappointment. Change the negative talk such as: “I can’t believe this happened” to “What can I learn from this so that I don’t experience this again?” This will help shift your mindset from victim to victor.
- Disappointment won’t last forever– It may not seem like it, but this feeling won’t last forever. Embrace your disappointment knowing it is only temporary, this will prepare you for all the new opportunities that will come your way. To move on to a new chapter you must finish the last one, reflect on your situation and how it makes you feel in order to let love in.
To train your brain to work through your disappointments try our ACTIVITY SHEET BELOW.
Until next time, stay confident, courageous